45yrsold

Vacation was much needed, we didn’t blow the lid off the place, and I enjoyed that really. I just wanted to get away from Buffalo for a little bit, get my head on straight, and figure out where I was going to take myself next. I think I’m going to embrace one of the bi-products of my sobriety and use some of my extra cash to do a little traveling. I know I have a trip out to Austin planned for mid-july.. I know I want to hit NYC again shortly after that or possibly before.. not quite sure.. I’m fairly confident that I have a wedding to attend in October that will be taking place in LA.

I have a new venture now.. that I’m going to try and embrace.. It’s going to take a great deal of work, but the best part is, that it fits in with everything else that I’m trying to pull off. If you know me, you’re aware of the many different ventures I’m trying to get wrapped up in. Whatcanidrawforyou, NippleBuddies, PubeDoodles, SlapitAnywhere, SpencerDevonshire, the Music, my Job, my house, sneaking some hanky panky in the mix.. well.. with this new venture, I have 7 side projects that I can focus my attention on. There are 7 days in a week, and I think I’m going to try and put in and catalogue at least 1 hour a week for each one of these things. They’re all viable and possibly profitable ideas, I just need to spend the time building them now. So, I hate to say it, but this is me officially pulling myself out of the fast lane of partying and getting screwed up, and merging into the lane of hyperspeed money making…

I love writing shit like this late at night.. it’s not even for anyone in particular.. it just helps me digest and regurgitate the ideas and concepts that have been going on in my brain.. it’s gotta come out! sorry.

ok I’m done.

114 days.

114 days sober gang. I have now been submerged into the training session which is going to be for my summer. Last summer consisted of me drinking my face off on my porch, margaritas, beach side brews and so on. This year, I can’t be drinking like that, and what better way to kick it off than to go on vacation to Texas, where margaritas flow like water and a cold beer is more refreshing than anything you’ve ever tasted before. Every time in the past when I’ve come here to party, I’ve literally spent hundreds on booze. Now that I don’t drink, I can put my money into more exciting things, but WOW do I want to drink some wine with my folks as we crush amazing food. I should have blogged about my 100th sober day, but I didn’t. I did get laid on my 100th sober day, which was nice, but some more exciting things happened. Clarity, seeing life and seeing where it could go, seeing how the alcohol was a hinderance to my progress through life. Goals are much more tangible now. Before, goals could be visualized, but if the process of completing the goals were brought into the metaphor of a set of stairs, alcohol clouded the vision of what those steps were, and now that its out of my brain, I can clearly see the steps. Clearly see what it takes to accomplish the goals that I could set for myself. I know what my goals are now, and I know what I have to do to achieve those goals.

blah blah blah goals.. what the hell did I just write about!? I’m fuckin weird sometimes when it’s 2am. (1am texan time)..

I’m glad I quit drinking, I never knew how much of a hinderance it was, and I guess it took me 100 days to fully feel like I was changed. I still have the occasional craving for alcohol, but it’s no longer for the sake of filling a void, it’s for the sake of the nostalgic qualities.. the taste of a fine full flavored wine.. the process of tasting it.. the cold bite of a margarita, and being able to tell if it was a “good” margarita or not from that first sip… the puff of cigar, feeling that smokey cedar resin coating the inside of my mouth and then breaking it all up with the intensity of a finely aged scotch… mouthwatering.. it’s all for nostalgia now.. nothing else.

well, now I am beat.. time for bed.. Hope my boss doesn’t call me too early.

jw

mac’s weird issue

I like to make music. I won’t say I’m great at it, but along with everything I do in my free time, It’s therapy through creation. Speaking of which, I have to get my whatcanidrawforyou.com site up and going hard again, I can’t believe I blew a whole month on it. I’ve been so damn busy! Sorry public – no excuses.. oh wait.. yes there is.. I’ve been crazy busy at work!

Well, today I decided I would take my laptop down to the creation dungeon to see what I could get going for recording some of the things I’ve been working on lately… I plugged an output from my main mixer to my computer and loaded up the audio recording software that I pimped off of my parents. I figured I should use my headphones in my computer to hear what I’m recording instead of pulling the line off my mixer to hear. I plug my out into my computer, then toss my headphones in and hit a sample. -nothing- Apparently, there is no way to hear your line in on your mac! it shows that it is registering, but there’s nothing!
I did a little digging, and found that there is a program called “lineIn” that allows you to fake it, but there is a tiny tiny delay on the audio, that when you’re pushing sample buttons to synchronize your music together… you can’t have any of that shit. So.. what the fuck Mac? what the fuck are you thinking not allowing us to hear our audio input?? what is the point of an audio input? What happens when I want to use garage band with a keyboard? fuckin’ weird.

two things

I had a friend refer to his penis as a ‘knob’ today… and that he was hopefully going home to get his ‘knob’ ’slobbed’ by his wife. This statement initially, while slightly overused and passe at this point, made me chuckle. However after my friend had made his exit after dropping this resounding knowledge on me, my brain meandered into a world of alternate places where ‘knob’ had been used in a statement where the ‘knob’ was not a means for grasping and assisting with the opening of a door or drawer. This was the phrase: “hob-knob”.. as I know it means to fraternize with people that you’re trying to impress, I began to get nervous that the knob in question was the same type of knob from the earlier part of this story, and that made me wonder what ‘hobbing’ was, and then brought my thoughts to the concept of whether or not I had inadvertently said I was going to blow some rich people…

the end.

and again

I made up a plate of leftovers to stick in the microwave, and I almost put the plate in the fridge instead.. door was open. . what gives! ? what is this bullshizzle.

gilette.. the best a man can get – for his teeth ???

So, I use Gillette, triple protection deodorant, and prior to going to bed, I went to brush my teeth. As I did this, I reached for my deodorant, and almost used it as toothpaste.. what’s the deal with that? !